Natural or unnatural baby?

Weird question right? I looked up the meaning of natural and based on the definitions in the Oxford and Cambridge dictionaries, I’m not quite sure whether I can associate their  meaning with the life of a child.

Cambridge dictionary
As found in nature and not involving anything made or done by people

Oxford dictionary
Existing in or derived from nature; not made or caused by humankind

Is there really such a thing as an unnatural baby? In my personal opinion- no! This topic is something that has been on my mind for a long time and I’ve really battled with the term “natural conception.” What does that even mean? Does it mean that a child born as a result of IUI, Clomid, IVF or Surrogacy is an unnatural or artificial child? How about adoption – are adopted children unnatural? If so, it means there are hundreds of thousands of unnatural or artificial children and adults inhabiting the earth…

Should there be a new tick box on forms to distinguish these perfectly normal human beings? Perhaps boxes that read
Natural being     Unnatural being 
Silly right? I may be taking this too far but, I feel many people struggle with the stigma of not conceiving “naturally”, having a caesarean section as opposed to a “natural” virginal birth, adoption, I’m sure the list can go on.

I recently had a conversation with an older woman who told me of her pain having gone through an unsuccessful round of IVF. She explained that she really longed to conceive “naturally”, easily and did not understand why it was so hard. I think that’s when it really hit me – this “natural conception” thing was really getting on my last nerve! Have we got to the point where we are saying a child born any other way other than intercourse is lower, inferior or menial to any other child? When I look at the two definitions above, I really cannot see how man can take all the credit for IUI, Clomid or IVF success. I am quite confident that God planted these great ideas and the ability to carry them out…

Even though it states that something “natural” does not involve interference by a person, where do we draw the line? Is intercourse an interference by humans? Ok, maybe that’s extreme but I really wanted to highlight that a child is a blessing – full stop. Whether you are blessed with a child as a result of intercourse, IUI, Clomid, IVF, surrogacy or adoption, that child is a living miracle. I know, and have met couples who are blessed with amazing children as a result of IVF and adoption and I have never looked at them differently from any other child – it’s never even crossed my mind to define them by their form of conception.

I sometimes wonder whether women put off seeking medical help for fear of being labelled – I know I did. I was so scared to speak about what was going on and thought that when God blesses me again with a child, people would ask me whether I conceived “naturally”. I was afraid of how I would answer or even avoid the question… It’s hard enough feeling that you’ve failed as a woman because your body is not doing what it is supposed to and you feeling the whole world can see it also, and then, to top it off, people will know that you have sought medical help…It’s a lot.com! Thank God for delivering me and using my situation to change my mindset. Truth is, if I wasn’t going through this journey, I’d probably have the same thoughts as the others.It’s easy to make your own assumptions and conclusions based on how God showed up for you but we also need to be mindful of the method God shows up for everyone else.

I understand that some people have waited and still will wait a long time for their miracle child and I cannot take away from their testimony of God doing it without medical help. My point is, that in all things, be it IVF, IUI, surrogacy, adoption or Clomid, God is always in it. Whether man takes the egg and mixes it with sperm in a dish, or gives you the exact date for intercourse after a trigger injection, to the sperm meeting the egg following intercourse, God still has the final say in whether it will all work. So, when I think about the term “natural conception”, I think all births are natural because man’s power does not even compare to the power of God. You can pay thousands of pounds for private healthcare, fly to different countries because you heard of great success rates – If God does not want it to happen, it won’t! End of, period, full stop.

All children are natural because Jeremiah 1:5 says so!

Be Encouraged, be expectant

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